Monday, December 06, 2004

Short Conversations

Some brief snippets of conversation that have occurred in and around work lately and made me laugh (I'm too tired to write my own material today, sorry):

Tim: (randomly, at lunch) I have 50 cents!
Me: I have two boobies.

Me: (while driving around with Mary and Rob looking at Christmas lights) Look! There's a Santa on the roof! And one in the yard. Which makes no sense.
Rob: I always knew he was duplicitous.

Mary: Hey, wanna go see Big Bad Voodoo Daddy with Amber and me?
Dennis: I can't see voodoo; I'm Catholic.

Me: I need some chocolate.
Bia: (pointedly looking at my ass) Oh, no you don't!

Me: Kristen loves her mom.
Mary: Kristen's mom's a whore.
Me: She loves me anyway.
Rob: Yeah, everyone loves Kristen's mom.

Bia: You should talk to me more. I like it when you talk.
Mary: But you always tell me to shut up.
Bia: It's out of love.

Tim: Well, it's almost 5:00 on Friday and all yous are gonna see is the back of my heels walking out the door.
Me: The back of your heels? Will the rest of you be covered in a shroud?

Ticket scalper outside yesterday's Browns game: Who needs two upset tickets?
Mary: Did he just say "upset tickets"?
Me: I think he did. Those must not be for today's game. Those would be called "about to get our asses handed to us" tickets.

Me: How's that OCD treating you?
Mary: I have to go check...everything. And then die.

(Mary bought a magnet at HOB that reads "Be Nice or Leave" and hung it in her workspace)
Dennis: What's with the sign?
Mary: It's instructional.

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