amberance (noun) - a neurotic, slutty, somewhat anti-social blog proprietress who loves cats, fears spiders and hates telephones.

In real life I am a 36 year old Chicagoan of Cleveland origin currently living in England. I used to make a living doing mathy-type things but now I am a graduate student studying gender and sexuality because if you're going to redo your entire life in one shot, you really ought to fucking go for it. I am a burlesque dancer. I hate potatoes. I have a colorful cast of characters in my life that keep it interesting, an evil cat who lives with my former roommate, a propensity for running into walls and breaking things, a pathological fear of talking to strangers, a long history of depression that I fight daily, a well documented fear of commitment and a passion for writing down things that I think are funny. All the spiders are plotting to kill and eat me. It is an open secret that I also write erotic semi-fiction. You won't find it here and you won't find any clues on how to get to it here. That said, it does exist and the deal is if you can find it you're free to read it. So far no one has.

In fictional life inside my head, I am a multi-lingual semi-famous writer who sings with both the Chicago Symphony Chorus and a punk band called Daddy Issues, and also a concert pianist. My imaginary home has a dedicated room for watching sports and a secret sex dungeon that can only be accessed by a secret door disguised as a book shelf. I get invited to all the best parties, or rather all the second best parties - the very best parties are the ones I host in my amazing house.

The Bizzybiz Blog is both my favorite hobby and the only thing keeping me sane (relatively).