amberance: there's a bird here just called a tit*
H-Town: wow, so you could say "look at the tits on that tree!"
and no one would slap you
and if tits landed on a woman, "Look at the tits on that gal?"
brilliant
The cake master: "There are so many tits on that tree! I've never seen so many tits in one place!"
H-Town: I wish I had more tits around my house!
I’m moving
The cake master: "Aren't the tits beautiful?"
Are the tits noisy?
H-Town: we wouldn't have such a mosquito problem if there are more tits
I hear tits make a slapping noise
The cake master: Are they soft and fluffy?
amberance: "HOLY SHIT THAT OWL JUST ATE THOSE TITS!"
H-Town: oh, now those tits just flew right into the window!
The cake master: Do they swing around in circles?
H-Town: do they hang low and/or wobble to and fro?
amberance: I want them to have really pointy beaks
like "man those are some sharp tits"
The cake master: Yeah, are there low-hanging tits?
They're only on the saggy branches?
H-Town: and if they're male, look at those man tits!
amberance: also they should always fly in pairs
H-Town: their nests should be called bras
and if tits landed on a woman, "Look at the tits on that gal?"
brilliant
The cake master: "There are so many tits on that tree! I've never seen so many tits in one place!"
H-Town: I wish I had more tits around my house!
I’m moving
The cake master: "Aren't the tits beautiful?"
Are the tits noisy?
H-Town: we wouldn't have such a mosquito problem if there are more tits
I hear tits make a slapping noise
The cake master: Are they soft and fluffy?
amberance: "HOLY SHIT THAT OWL JUST ATE THOSE TITS!"
H-Town: oh, now those tits just flew right into the window!
The cake master: Do they swing around in circles?
H-Town: do they hang low and/or wobble to and fro?
amberance: I want them to have really pointy beaks
like "man those are some sharp tits"
The cake master: Yeah, are there low-hanging tits?
They're only on the saggy branches?
H-Town: and if they're male, look at those man tits!
amberance: also they should always fly in pairs
H-Town: their nests should be called bras
The cake master: If there a bunch of nests built on top of each other, are they called support bras?
H-Town: training bras
and if the nests are all mashed together into one sort of uni-nest, it's a sports bra
i hope when they walk, they bounce
The cake master: There's birds that look like tits
H-Town: training bras
and if the nests are all mashed together into one sort of uni-nest, it's a sports bra
i hope when they walk, they bounce
The cake master: There's birds that look like tits
But they’re fake tits
You can tell by feeling them.
H-Town: you can tell because they don't move as much
The cake master: I hear the male tit is smaller though.
And not as bouncy
H-Town: People must wonder why male tits have beaks
The cake master: I sure do
H-Town: tits usually show up about spring break each year
The cake master: well, in the winter they're all covered up
H-Town: and sometimes it's so cold their beaks could cut glass
The cake master: I hear you can tell if it's cold just by looking at a naked tit
As they get older, the more their beaks point at the ground
H-Town: the older tits just walk around naked at the local YMCA in the locker rooms
You can tell by feeling them.
H-Town: you can tell because they don't move as much
The cake master: I hear the male tit is smaller though.
And not as bouncy
H-Town: People must wonder why male tits have beaks
The cake master: I sure do
H-Town: tits usually show up about spring break each year
The cake master: well, in the winter they're all covered up
H-Town: and sometimes it's so cold their beaks could cut glass
The cake master: I hear you can tell if it's cold just by looking at a naked tit
As they get older, the more their beaks point at the ground
H-Town: the older tits just walk around naked at the local YMCA in the locker rooms
*In America we don't have tits, but instead the related titmouse and chickadee.
4 comments:
Tits are over-rated. Cocks are the fan favourite.
Just wait till you meet a cockchafer. It'll blow your mind.
Since girls are called birds some places in the UK can't you say "look at the tits on that bird" too?
Why thank you, Colonialist.
A bird landed on my shoulder today. I blogged about it because it was traumatising. It wasn't a tit, though, because if that were the case I would have immediately been able to shout: "THERE IS A TIT ON MY SHOULDER."
Because you have to.
EVERYONE DRINK!
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