Introducing Fred

Friends, there is someone I'd like you all to meet. Everyone say hi to Fred.

Did I mention that Fish is the bestest guy EVER? He showed up at my house last night with Ghostbusters II, Stripes, pizza money and Fred. Because he rules like that.

First of all can I say Apple's packaging rocks hard core? Because it does. That photo on the front of the box is life size. I know because Fred is sitting directly on top of the picture on his box now. Also I got iPod and iTunes software, a USB cable, ear buds, two sets of ear bud covers, instructions, warranty information, apple stickers and a little dock adapter for a regular dock (sold separately). Fred himself was wrapped in a plastic wrapper that advised me not to steal music. Oh and that Fish guy? Had Fred engraved for me: 'To My Ish: Let The Pending Cease"*. Aww.

When we unwrapped him, we found that Fred was powerful hungry, so we fed him a bunch of songs. Fish, being that he's one of "those", runs around town with an iBook (which I have nicknamed "The Breather" because of that LED light that dims and brightens rhythmically and freaks me right the fuck out), so when we plugged Fred into it, the Breather automatically formatted Fred for Mac. This was ok until I plugged him in at work today and he was wiped clean and reformatted for Windows. I'll be able to put the songs back next time I see Fish, but in the short term, it means I don't get to rock the N.E.R.D. or Jay-Z/Linkin Park remixes on my way home tonight. It also means I have to be careful about how much I play him this weekend on Golf Trip 2 since I won't have a USB port to plug him into for go juice.

I love Fred.

*Yes, we do realize that this makes no sense. We know this girl who is dumb, but thinks she's smart. She tries to prove this by using words that are just slightly too big for her. Such as pending. She grasps that it means you are waiting for something, but not what kind of waiting. So when she asked her ex if they could get back together and he didn't answer right away, she ended up sending him a message telling him she needed an answer which read "I can't take the pending". It's hilarious because she talks/writes like that all the time. Fish calls it "Faux Eloquence". I call it priceless. Stay tuned for more faux eloquence as it occurs.