BrownsFan sent me this link today to an article that basically takes everything I said about how horrible Ana and Christian's relationship is in 50 Shades of Grey and backs it up with genuine data.
RESOLVED: Every aspect of this relationship is a textbook case of partner abuse and every behavior Ana responds with is classic behavior for an abuse victim. SCIENCE, MOTHERFUCKERS.
'Fifty Shades of Grey' promotes violence against women, study says
10 comments:
Fantastic! Validation!
An author really must be held in some way accountable for the social implications of the things they appear to endorse. If EL James had said that, actually, Christian and Ana's relationship was meant to be seen as destructive and negative, that would be another matter entirely.
This is something I'm keeping aware of, since I've just started working on a new series, a YA steampunk fantasy about a girl who loses her social status when her father dies, and rebels against the government to save her mother. It's my first time writing a female protagonist, and I'm conscious of a number of issues I want to raise and ensure are represented in a positive way.
Here is the original study, as accurate as it is depressing: http://online.liebertpub.com/doi/full/10.1089/jwh.2013.4344 If you really want to make yourself ragey, reas until the end when the authors conclude that the popularity of the novel indicates an ongoing tolerance of intimate partner violence, and then go read Cosmo's response: http://www.cosmopolitan.com/celebrity/news/fifty-shades-msu-study
You'll need a drink.
This is why I love you Amber. I posted the article on my Facebook and someone replied saying I need to chill and that I must not have an interesting sex life.
I DO! That is why I know what a BDSM relatiionship looks like. Our private life would probably make her head spin, in fact, but it is CONSENSUAL and SAFE and full of TRUST and RESPECT, four words that EL James clearly missed when trolling her thesaurus for painful and inelegant similes.
Why are people so stupid that they think these f*cking books are a bible of fact rather than the dullard ramblings of a chancer who has access to a keyboard and Wikipedia.
Anonymous - Read the Cosmo piece, but didn't expect anything different because it's Cosmo and as far as I can tell, Cosmo has never given one piece of healthy constructive advice to women in its entire 46 year run as a women's magazine. What cheered me up were the comments, which were almost universally opposed to the Cosmo article, barring one or two people who were immediately and resoundingly corrected.
S - I WISH someone would say something like that to me so I can ask them "I'm sorry which is the part that is uninteresting? The part where my bruises last for weeks or the part where I've spent so much money at Extreme Restraints that they sent me a straight jacket for free?"
Paul Anthony - That sounds really interesting! Let me know if you need any advice on what a rebellious girl might have to say ;)
That would be great! I'd be so grateful for any help, and having been a fan of yours for so long, I'd be particularly honoured.
In response to above comments, I'd like to add that I have never touched BDSM and never will (no offence meant to any of you, I just don't personally see any appeal in it) but that doesn't mean I have an uninteresting sex life.
What about the time I shagged five guys in a row because another woman bet me £100 I couldn't? Would you call that uninteresting? Irresponsible, maybe, but not uninteresting. I admit it was irresponsible.
More to the point, I'm coming across more and more articles talking about how 50SoG depicts an abusive and damaging relationship which has restored my faith in people somewhat. I just hope it's not too little, too late.
I find it frustrating that they attack your sex life, as though being concerned about the portrayal of an abusive relationship makes you boring when most of the time it is the exact opposite.
Some may find my sex life boring but I like it. I've done some pretty hardcore BDSM and find this book horrific because it is so wrong.I've been on the Dom side of things and find him to be a horrible Dom and he shows all the signs of being an abuser. I just can't wrap my head around any of it. I work in a store that sells sex toys and we have a line that looks like 50 shades stuff but it isn't exactly the licensed stuff so fortunately I don't have to look at the title constantly.
However I've had to explain to many people the best way to engage in play. I've been on the Dom side and the sub side so fortunately I have plenty of experience to help the first timers but I do worry about those who are to ashamed to ask for advice and jump into it using this book as a guide.
I also worry about those girls who think this is the kind of guy they should be looking for when he is so obviously an abuser. When I read it I saw Ana as a cowering mess most of the time. Who would find that romantic?
I love reading your blog.
I'm just reading the paper at the moment, and some of the quotations from the book are completely shocking.(e.g. “I need you to behave in a certain way, and if you don't, I shall punish you, and you will learn to behave in the way I desire”. ARGH.)
Like 'S', I posted the link on my Facebook, and one of my female friends expressed disdain that people had spent time doing this. Kind of disappointing.
Thanks a lot for blogging this, it was unbelieveably informative and helped me tons.
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