Thursday, July 13, 2006

Shows and Hoes

Cousin Rick is coming to town this weekend to go see CAKE play at a church festival (not even kidding) and hang out with his favorite cousin (me). He will be bringing along a grown up friend and another cousin of ours, who is 11.

While I greatly look forward to said visit and concert, I've come up with two potential problems.

The first is where the hell am I going to put three people in my apartment? Rick says they can all sleep on the floor, but what floor? I haven't seen my floor in two weeks. Should I store them in the beer boxes? The attic? Out on the porch? No matter where I stick them I need to clean my house.

The second problem came to me just this morning while I merrily showered (what, you don't shower merrily?): my house is not in any way childproof. I don't mean in a hide the cleaning supplies and put plastic covers on the outlets sort of way. What I mean is that my refridgerator is covered in erotic magnetic poetry, my shower curtain sports Playboy covers through the years, more Playboys litter my dining room table (they came free with the roommate) and my bedroom wall features 11 photographs of naked lady parts (and a Sports Illustrated cover of Danica Patrick. Shut up). So, you know, maybe not entirely appropriate for an 11 year old kid. Or many adults for that matter.

Seems I have more cleaning to do than I thought.


H said...

I can help hide the playboys. And Danica Patrick.

monogodo said...

When I was 11 my dad had a stash of Playboys in the basement that we were allowed to peruse because he said they were "educational".

My mom disagreed and threw them out.

monogodo said...

If you're interested in going to Lollapalooza I know where you can get a 3-day pass for $120.

daniel said...

i believe noone would appreciate a playboy more than an 11yo boy. ;)

Cousin Rick said...

Thanks to the bartender for starting to get some space for us, but John B. really bailed us out. He had plenty of room for all three of us. He has an awesome apartment. It was great to see my favorite cousin again. Hope we didn't stress you with the timing of our visit. Let's visit again soon. Derek said he will comment later, although he was sad that he didn't get a shot at, at least one of the playboy's (he just turned 12 and his is much more able to appreciate the "reading material" -not just the pictures).

12 year old kid said...

well since i didn't get to sleep at your "wonderful" apartment I had to sleep with john.... (how-much-fun) i think ur just not the favorite cousin any more. O yeah playboy magazine dosen't realy bother me. next time i have to come to your house i'll make sure I'm 21.
One more question: what are you trying to say by shows and hoes?